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Woman's Little Instruction Book
* If you think the way to a man's heart
is through his stomach, you're aiming too high.
* Women don't make fools of men -- most of them are the do-it-yourself types.
* The best reason to divorce a man is a health reason: you're sick of him.
* Never trust a man who says he's the boss at home. He probably lies about other things
* A woman's work that is never done is the stuff she asked her husband to do.
* If you want a nice man, go for a bald one -- they try harder.
* Go for younger men. You might as well -- they never mature anyway.
* A man who can dress himself without looking like Forest Gump is unquestionably gay.
* Men are all the same -- they just have different faces so you can tell them apart.
* Definition of a man with manners -- he gets out of the bath to pee.
* Whenever you meet a man who would make a good husband, you will usually find that he
* Scientists have just discovered something that can do the work of five men -- a woman.
* There are a lot of words you can use to describe men-- strong, caring, loving -- they'd
be wrong but you can still use them.
* Men are like animals -- messy, insensitive and potentially violent, but they make great
* Men's brains are like the prison system -- not enough cells per man.
* There are only two four letter words that are offensive to men - "don't"
and "stop" (unless they're used together).
* Husbands are like children -- they're fine if they're someone else's.
* If a man appears sexy, caring and smart, give him a day and he will be back to his usual
* All men are like chickens with their heads cut off when they see beautiful women pass
* If your man appears happy, excited and keeps looking at you all of a sudden, he is
probably checking out the women behind you.
* Figuring out men is like trying to make a jigsaw puzzle in a car. Once you think
you have it all put together, you find another piece but you don't know where it goes.
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