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If Women Ruled the World

If Women Ruled the World...   

... Men would sit around and wonder what WE are thinking. 

... Women with cold hands would give men prostate exams.
... PMS would be a legitimate defense in court.
... Men would get reputations for sleeping around.
... Singles bars would have metal detectors to weed out men hiding wedding rings in their pockets.
... A man would no longer be considered a "good catch" simply because he is breathing.
... Fewer women would be dieting because their ideal weight standard would increase by 40 pounds.
... Shopping would be considered an aerobic activity.
... "Ms." Magazine would have an annual swimsuit issue featuring scantily clad male models.
... Men would not be allowed to eat gas-producing foods within two hours of bedtime.
... Men would be secretaries for female bosses, working twice as hard for none of the credit.
... Little girls would read "Snow White and the Seven Hunks."
... Men would bring drinks, chips and dip to women watching soap operas.
... Men would HAVE to get Playboy for the articles, because there would be no pictures.
... Men would learn phrases like:  "I'm sorry," "I love you," "You're beautiful," "Of course you don't look fat in that outfit."

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