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Mississippi School Absentees


These are real notes written from parents in a Mississippi school district. (Spellings have been left intact.) My  son  is  under  a   doctor's  care  and  should not take P.E. today. Please execute him.

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Please  excuse  Lisa  for  being  absent.  She was sick and I had her shot.

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Dear School: Please ekscuse John being absent on Jan. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, and also 33

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Please excuse Gloria from Jim today.  She  is  administrating.

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Please excuse Roland from P.E. for a few days. Yesterday he fell out of a tree and misplaced his hip.

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John has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his face.

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Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing  football.  He was hurt in the growing part.

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Megan could not come to school today because she has been bothered by very close veins.

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Chris  will  not  be  in  school  cus he has an acre in his side.

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Please excuse Ray Friday from school.  He has very loose vowels.

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Please excuse Pedro from being absent yesterday. He had (diahre) (dyrea) (direathe) the shits. [Words were crossed out in the ()'s]

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Please excuse Tommy for being absent yesterday.  He had diarrhea and his boots leak.

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Irving  was  absent  yesterdy because he missed his bust.

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Pease excuse Jimmy for being. It was his father's fault.

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I kept Billie home because she had to go Christmas shopping because I don't know what size she wear.

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Please excuse Jennifer for missing school yesterday. We  forgot  to  get the  Sunday  paper  off  the porch, and  when  we   found  it  Monday, we  thought  it  was  Sunday.

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Sally won't be in school a week from Friday. We have to attend her funeral.

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My daughter was absent yesterday because she w! as tired. She spent a weekend with the Marines.

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Please excuse Jason for being absent yesterday. He had a cold and could not breed well.

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Please excuse Mary for being absent yesterday. She was in bed with gramps.

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Gloria was absent yesterday as she was having a gangover.

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Please excuse Brenda, she has been sick  and  under  the  doctor.

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Maryann was absent December 11-16, because she had a fever, sore throat, headache and upset stomach. Her sister was also sick, fever and sore throat, her brother had a low grade fever and ached all over. I wasn't the best either, sore throat and fever. There must be something going around, her father even got hot last night.



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