true stories  |  urban legends  |  funny vocabulary
You Are Here: home funny stories people the irritated cowboy

The Irritated Cowboy


Shortly after the cattle had been loaded into the railroad cars to be shipped to Chicago for processing, before starting the journey each car was assigned an attendant to feed, water and watch the cattle on the way. This is a story of one such cowboy assigned to that job:

Following the arrival and unloading of the cattle in Chicago, the cowboy headed for a restaurant for a long overdue dinner The only seat left was next to a very young lady of perhaps 20 years of age who appeared to be wealthy and with poise that reflected a substantial education. He could not help overhearing her order as she said, "I'll have the breast of fowl...virgin fowl, please. Make very sure it is virgin, catch it yourself. Garnish my plate with mild onions, a cup of coffee, not too hot and please not too cold. Oh! and would you please open the window...I smell cows, there must be a cowboy in here."

Thoroughly pissed off by now, the cowboy placed his order like this: "I'll have the duck, a fucked duck. Make damn sure it is well fucked, fuck it yourself. Garnish my plate with horse shit, a cup of coffee as strong as Texas mule piss. Blow off the foam with a big ripe fart and would you knock out a wall, I smell a cunt... there must be a whore in the house."



Comment or Share Your Own One Liner







privacy policy