1. Lesson Number One
A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A small rabbit saw
the crow, and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day
long? The crow answered: "Sure, why not." So, the rabbit sat on
the ground below the crow, and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the
rabbit and ate it.
* To be sitting and doing
nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.
2. Lesson Number Two:
A turkey was chatting
with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree," sighed
the turkey, "but I haven't got the energy. "Well, why don't you nibble on some
of my droppings?" replied the bull. "They're packed with nutrients." The
turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it actually gave him enough strength to
reach the first branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached
the second branch. Finally after a forth night, there he was proudly perched at the top of
the tree. Soon he was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree.
* Bullshit might get you
to the top, but it won't keep you there.
3. Lesson Number Three:
A little bird was flying
south for the winter. It was so cold, the bird froze and fell to the ground in a large
field. While it was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on it. As the frozen
bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, it began to realize how warm it was. The dung was
actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy.
A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat
discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him!
* 1) Not everyone who
drops shit on you is your enemy.
* 2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.
* 3) And when you're in deep shit, keep your mouth shut!
4. Lesson Number Four:
The boy rode on the
donkey and the old man walked. As they went along, they passed some people who remarked it
was a shame the old man was walking and the boy was riding. The man and boy thought maybe
the critics were right, so they changed positions. Later, they passed some people that
remarked, What a shame, he makes that little boy walk." They decided they both would
walk! Soon they passed some more people who thought they were stupid to walk when they had
a decent donkey to ride. So the both rode the donkey! Now they passed some people that
shamed them by saying how awful to put such a load on a poor donkey. The boy and man said
they were probably right so they decided to carry the donkey. As they crossed a bridge,
they lost their grip on the animal and he fell into the river and drowned.
* If you try to please
everyone, you will eventually lose your ass!