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Level of Insanity
1) At lunchtime, sit in your parked car w/sunglasses on and point
a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.
2) Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.
3) Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine
addictions, switch to espresso.
4) In the memo field of all your cheques, write "FOR SEXUAL FAVORS."
5) Finish all your sentences with "In accordance with the prophecy."
6) Dont use any punctuation
7) As often as possible, skip rather than walk.
8) Ask people what sex they are. Laugh hysterically after they answer.
9) Specify that your drive-through order is "to go".
10) Sing along at the opera.
11) Put mosquito netting around your work area. Play a tape of jungle sounds all
12) Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you're
not in the mood.
13) When the money comes out of the ATM, scream "I Won! I Won! 3rd time this
14) When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot,
yelling, "Run for your lives, they're loose!"
15) Tell your children over dinner. "Due to the economy, we are going to have to let
one of you go."
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