More One Liners

He who laughs last, thinks slowest.

Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film.

A day without sunshine is like, well, night.

On the other hand, you have different fingers.

Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.

When the chips are down, the buffalo is empty.

Seen it all, done it all, can't remember most of it.

Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.

I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.

He's not dead, he's electroencephalographically challenged.

You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you.

I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges.

Honk if you love peace and quiet.

Despite the cost of living, have you noticed how it remains so popular?

Nothing is fool-proof to a sufficiently talented fool.

It is hard to understand how a cemetery raised its burial cost and blamed it on the cost of living.

Just remember...if the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off.

The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.

It is said that if you line up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try and pass them.

You can't have everything, where would you put it?

Latest survey shows that 3 out of 4 people make up 75% of the world's population.

The things that come to those that wait may be the things left by those who got there first.

A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.

It was recently discovered that research causes cancer in rats.

Everybody lies, but it doesn't matter since nobody listens.

I wished the buck stopped here, as I could use a few.

I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it.

Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

Comment or Share Your Own One Liner

Roch Vintel Vazquez (Tue, 16 Aug 2011 03:29:37 -0700): With great power, comes great butt kicking fun.

Rabia Basri (Fri, 19 Aug 2011 09:03:32 -0700): when life gives u a green signal, cross the road of uncertainties, lest somebody hit you right in yo legs and yo whole life you stagger.

Shamsher Gondal (Sat, 20 Aug 2011 10:38:13 -0700): wisdom streams down ur lips.... nice lines !!!

Brian O'Connor (Mon, 12 Sep 2011 02:28:56 -0700): A Babysitter Is A Teenager Acting Like An Adult While The Adults Are Out Acting Like Teenagers.

Ankur Pandey (Wed, 14 Sep 2011 05:07:29 -0700): The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.

Elle Gibson (Sat, 15 Oct 2011 07:23:43 -0700): You can't have everything, where would you put it?

Saud Musheer (Fri, 21 Oct 2011 18:42:25 -0700): I think Lady Gaga just puts glue on herself and rolls around in random items.

Saud Musheer (Fri, 21 Oct 2011 18:43:00 -0700): I wasn't going to do anything today... so far I'm right on schedule.

Saud Musheer (Fri, 21 Oct 2011 18:43:30 -0700): How do you know google is a woman? She won't let you complete the whole sentence before she starts guessing & suggesting.

Saud Musheer (Fri, 21 Oct 2011 18:43:59 -0700): Few people are so negative, that if they walk in a dark room they will begin to develop.

Saud Musheer (Fri, 21 Oct 2011 18:44:28 -0700): It's not that I'm always partying, I just don't take pictures while I'm working....

Saud Musheer (Fri, 21 Oct 2011 18:44:54 -0700): " I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but world War IV will be fought with sticks and stones." - Albert Einstein.

Saud Musheer (Fri, 21 Oct 2011 18:45:24 -0700): "principles will surely make you rich, if nothing then you can at least sell them for right price".

Saud Musheer (Fri, 21 Oct 2011 18:45:54 -0700): We live in the "WTF" generation. [W]ikipedia [T]witter [F]acebook.

Saud Musheer (Fri, 21 Oct 2011 18:46:20 -0700): I watched Transformers today. I've spent 2 hours in my garage telling the car I know his secret. He's shy

Saud Musheer (Fri, 21 Oct 2011 18:47:03 -0700): I wonder, Does Lady Gaga ever have problem in choosing what to wear for Halloween...

Saud Musheer (Fri, 21 Oct 2011 18:47:53 -0700): Trust me I was born naive, let me blame this society for the evil I possess.

Saud Musheer (Fri, 21 Oct 2011 18:48:20 -0700): My parents said I should watch fewer movies and read more. So I turned on the subtitles.

Saud Musheer (Fri, 21 Oct 2011 18:48:49 -0700): I don't have a license to kill, but I do have a learner's permit.

Saud Musheer (Fri, 21 Oct 2011 18:49:10 -0700): Don't act as you know everything, unless your name is Google.

Saud Musheer (Fri, 21 Oct 2011 18:50:05 -0700): These police take Hide and Seek really seriously.