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These are real notes
written from parents in a Mississippi school district.
(Spellings have been left intact.) My son isÂ
under a  doctor's care and should
not take P.E. today. Please execute him.
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Please excuseÂ
Lisa for being absent. She was sick and I
had her shot.
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Dear School: Please
ekscuse John being absent on Jan. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, and also 33
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Please excuse Gloria
from Jim today. She is administrating.
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Please excuse Roland
from P.E. for a few days. Yesterday he fell out of a tree and
misplaced his hip.
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John has been absent
because he had two teeth taken out of his face.
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Carlos was absent
yesterday because he was playing football. He was hurt
in the growing part.
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Megan could not come to
school today because she has been bothered by very close veins.
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Chris willÂ
not be in school cus he has an acre in his
side.
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Please excuse Ray Friday
from school. He has very loose vowels.
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Please excuse Pedro from
being absent yesterday. He had (diahre) (dyrea) (direathe) the
shits. [Words were crossed out in the ()'s]
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Please excuse Tommy for
being absent yesterday. He had diarrhea and his boots leak.
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Irving wasÂ
absent yesterdy because he missed his bust.
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Pease excuse Jimmy for
being. It was his father's fault.
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I kept Billie home
because she had to go Christmas shopping because I don't know what
size she wear.
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Please excuse Jennifer
for missing school yesterday. We forgot to get theÂ
Sunday paper off the porch, and whenÂ
we  found it Monday, we thoughtÂ
it was Sunday.
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Sally won't be in school
a week from Friday. We have to attend her funeral.
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My daughter was absent
yesterday because she w! as tired. She spent a weekend with the
Marines.
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Please excuse Jason for
being absent yesterday. He had a cold and could not breed well.
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Please excuse Mary for
being absent yesterday. She was in bed with gramps.
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Gloria was absent
yesterday as she was having a gangover.
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Please excuse Brenda,
she has been sick and under the doctor.
---------------------------------------------
Maryann was absent
December 11-16, because she had a fever, sore throat, headache and
upset stomach. Her sister was also sick, fever and sore throat, her
brother had a low grade fever and ached all over. I wasn't the best
either, sore throat and fever. There must be something going around,
her father even got hot last night. | 
