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Expressions for a Woman's High Stress Days

 1. You! Off my planet!!

 2. Not the brightest crayon in the box now, are we?

 3.  Well, this day was a total waste of makeup.

 4. Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.

 5. And your crybaby whiny opinion would be...?

 6. I'm not crazy, I've just been in a very bad mood for 30  years.

 7. Allow me to introduce my selves.

 8. Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.

 9. Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed.

10. Do they ever shut up on your planet?

11. I'm just working here till a good fast-food job opens up.

12. I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.

13. Stress is when you wake up screaming and you realize you haven't fallen asleep yet.

14. I can't remember if I'm the good twin or the evil one.

15. At least I don't have to adjust my crotch!

16. I just want revenge. Is that so wrong?

17. You say I'm  nasty like it's a bad thing.

18. Can I trade this job for what's behind door #2?

19. Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?

20. Chaos, panic & disorder - my work here is done.

21. Everyone thinks I'm psychotic, except for my friends deep inside the earth.

22. Earth is full. Go home.

23. Is it time for your medication or mine?

24. Aw, did I step on your poor little bitty ego?

25. How do I set a laser printer to stun?

26. I'm not tense, just terribly, terribly alert.

27. When I want your opinion, I'll give it to you.

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